Talking Story with Say Leadership Coaching

What’s your signature story?

Employee engagement expert David Zinger has written a wonderful article for Joyful Jubilant Learning about our signature stories. David writes:

“Here are some markers to uncover or create your signature story:

1. It is the story you tell often, or stories you tell often that have the same theme.
2. It is the story you most need to hear, even when you are the person telling it.
3. It is the story you most need to tell, if you could tell only one more story what would it be.
4. It is the story that you can tell a thousand times but you keep learning from it almost every time your tell it.
5. It is the story that lives in you and may come alive every time you tell it.
6. It is the story that is most authentic and true for you.
7. It is the story you most want to read.
8. It is an "easy" story to tell because it is so much a part of you.
9. It is a story that when you tell it, it strengthens you.”

Click over and read his entire posting: Signature Stories: More than Once Upon A Time.

Aloha, welcome to Talking Story.

Thanks for stopping by: Are you ready to start a new conversation? You may be surprised at how many possibilities you can kick off where you work! My goal is to inspire you to do so.

Say Leadership Coaching is based in Hawai‘i, and ‘talking story’ is a local expression meaning exactly what it sounds like; talking through stuff to get the whole story told —or created! We believe that despite all the time we spend in the workplace, most people don’t get past small-talk chatting, politically-correct banter and unproductive silences. We don’t talk to each other enough about the important stuff that counts —the stuff that can give us the best work/life stories possible.

The good news? It doesn’t take that much to improve our workplaces, and we can all do it! Bring the water cooler spirit with you throughout your day: Talking story is much more effective than we give it credit for being. Conversation creates energy, makes your ideas happen, and gets your relationships to bloom and thrive.

So are you ready to make a difference where you work?
Let’s talk story.

~ Rosa Say, the Workplace Aloha Coach™
and author of Managing with Aloha

Action Steps:

1. Take a quick look: “You can see the joy in talking story even when you can't hear the words being said.”
2. Join the Ho‘ohana Community: Grab a Talking Story feed or subscribe for emails. Then, come check out our sister sites too – updates are done at both several times a week.

Keywords: Aloha. Values. Learning. GREAT Community.

Visit us at:

• Joyful Jubilant Learning.  [Feed Subscription] and at

• Managing with Aloha Coaching.  [Subscription Page]

Mea Ho‘okipa Live Their Aloha Every Day

Talking Story has given me pure joy over the last month when I think about our Ho‘ohana Community. This was our eleventh forum on these pages and our twelfth one when I count A Love Affair with Books this past March on Joyful Jubilant Learning, and one might think that I have over-extended my welcome with you, and that you would start to ignore my requests to participate, especially with so many other forums to choose from as the blog-scape has grown. Not so.

You are stars. Your writing improves with every new entry, and beyond the pure BEing of the Mea Ho‘okipa you are, you dazzle me with your talent and your insight! You give ideas freely, you open yourself to conversation about them, and you support each other author-to-author with such intuitive empathy.

Know this: Your aloha spirit gets evermore enriched with the warmth of lokomaika‘i, the generosity that comes from good heart. I hope you feel this too; that you have received while giving.

There are times I think I could continue writing about the values of our lives forever, and this is one of them. They ARE universal, and they DO shape our lives because of the way they have shaped our CHOICES. Yet every day it becomes much clearer to me that I will never be able to learn all there is to learn about them in my lifetime —even those values which I am most passionate about.

These forums illustrate something for me that I say to my coaching clients and the managers and leaders I mentor over and over again, without a care about the possibility they may be tired of hearing it from me: We learn best from other people.

When others lay out their welcome mat, willing to share their experiences with you, stuff your pockets (and your head) with every shred of humility you have, and take off your shoes so your bare feet can feel each thread of that welcome mat. Open up your spirit and listen well, for another’s willingness to teach you their life-lessons-learned is the greatest gift they can give.

Mahalo nui loa. From my learner’s heart and the aloha of my soul’s spirit, my deepest gratitude to the very talented and giving authors and Mea Ho‘okipa who wrote for us this month. You are Kūpuna, my respected teachers.

Remember that these authors are your neighbors in our Ho‘ohana Community, and in this, my recap listing for our essays on Ho‘okipa, the value of hospitality, I have linked both their articles here and the sites at which they normally write so that you may visit them often. I know they have their welcome mats waiting for you there too.

So remember, step onto them with bare feet!

Our learning about Ho‘okipa:

Ho'okipa Via The United States Postal Service by Deb Estep, author of Deb Inside.

NEVER, EVER let anyone tell you that snail mail is a thing of the past. It’s almost as if the paper of the card or letter is ~charged~ with the Spirit of Ho’okipa. From your hand and heart, to the receiver’s hand and heart. A most powerful thing indeed!

Build Energy then Go Where the Energy Is by Lisa Haneberg, author of Management Craft, 2 Weeks 2 A Breakthrough, and Essay a Smile.

I just came back from a 40 day, 9,400 mile motorcycle book tour. I visited 34 states and connected with thousands of people. Long trips are great for helping us see patterns and insights we might otherwise miss.

Hospitality: Our Gatherings Seek to Meet a Need and Our Gatherings Nudge Us Toward Collaboration, both by Reg Adkins, author of Elemental Truths, Hero of the Week, and Faith Based Counseling.

Well guided gatherings have the following characteristics of hospitality ... A good meeting host knows the aspect of a meeting which embodies the feeling of professional hospitality.

Successful hosts guide discussions to involve all viewpoints and make sure group members know they have open-door access.

The Mingwe (Mingo) native peoples of the Appalachian mountains had a wonderful method for insuring every member of the group had an opportunity to participate in meetings and yet no one individual could monopolize the attention.

When matters were of significant importance to require a meeting of the group the host (usually the eldest member of the group) would begin the discussion by holding a symbol of attention (the talking stick).

Hospitality: The Key to Peace on Earth by Maria Palma, author of Customers Are Always, and The Good Life.

As I sit here and reflect on what hospitality means to me, I start to wonder how much better the world would be if each and every one of us was taught hospitality at a young age.  What if it were a class like English or Math?  Do you think the business world would be different?

Ho'okipa: A Mother's Love by Dave Rothacker, author of Rothacker Reviews and Radioback.

She was dog tired.  Worked nine hours, picked up Jen and Liz from day care, stopped by the grocery store, got home and made dinner, cleaned up and gave the kids a bath.  The kids weren't ready for bed so she read a little Dr. Suess to them. She heard the words coming from her mouth, but her mind began to drift...

Dissecting Hospitality and The Business End of Southern Hospitality by April Groves, author of My Beautiful Chaos and Making Life Work for You.

Hospitality is an idea. Ho'okipa is a series of events. A manner of treatment. A dedication to excellence. Take a new look at an old practice with fresh eyes.

Living in the South, the word "hospitality" gets used a lot. It is a badge of honor to be considered a good provider of "Southern Hospitality" in your home. This comes in the form of cold tea, hot biscuits, a good meal, and warm pie. You would never be rude to company - maybe family, but never company. A covered plate to take home would always be offered. Don't mind about returning the plate - you can keep it. Wonderful friendships are formed in these circumstances.

Writer, reader, place: writing with ho'okipa by Joanna Young, author of Coaching Wizardry and Confident Writing.

Hospitality has to start with ourselves.  ...That ho'okipa is about knowing who you are and where you've come from.  And more than that it's about respect and love for the place where you find yourselves.  That means creating a sense of  place: helping people to understand and love the place they are visiting, that sense of being at home. It's about knowing (and loving) the place that you've come from. And it's about respecting and sustaining the environment that has brought us together, has brought us here.

Hospitality is more than façades by Dwayne Melancon, author of Genuine Curiosity.

You walk into a hotel, and it has a terrific lobby - clean, comfortable, well-kept, and inviting. So far, so good. You walk up to the check-in desk for the next layer of hospitality opportunities. This is your first opportunity to see the hotel's true colors ...

No Requests Required by Carolyn Manning, author of Thoughts & Philosophies and Productivity Goal.

When Rosa first brought up the subject of hospitality, I thought it would be an easy topic to cover.  After all, we're surrounded with all manner of hospitality in our lives.  Ah, but therein lay the rub,  It's almost too much subject for one subject.

After some thought, though, the filament in the mental lightbulb vibrated to warmth and the brightest word was "surrounded".

Hospitality: It feels like home, by Phil Gerbyshak, author of Make it Great! and becoming widely known as The Relationship Geek.

I thought first of organizations that don't make me feel like home. ... Then, I thought of the organizations I give up more too. They often have a personal cry for help, make real connections with me, and I know a few of the others in the group. Occasionally when I see my friends that are involved, we mention the group, their mission, if it's still worth our time, and usually we agree it is, so I'll go to a fundraiser and give a bit more of my talent, treasure, and time.

Be worth copying by Rebecca Thomas, author of Rebecca Thomas Designs.

I was flabbergasted. As far as I knew, we’d just sat there, processed people in to the event, snacked, chatted, and generally had fun while we worked. I asked her what specifically she would be stealing, and she said it was all about my organization and the spirit I cultivated around the gate by including food and encouraging people to come visit and entertain us. By doing so little, I’d made the gate crew, the first people seen at the event, a lively, efficient bunch. Sometimes, providing good service is as simple as taking care of those who are supposed to be providing the service.

 

Maria Palma brought us an added treat: Welcome to the Customer Service Carnivale! with the ho'okipa generosity of eight more authors.

1. Matt Hanson presented Building Visibility with Promotional Umbrellas posted at Matt's Creative Advertising Blog.
2. Jason Rakowski presented CRM Software posted at Learn Good Customer Service.
3. Meikah Delid presented CustServ: Customer Relations: The New Competitive Edge posted at CustServ: Customer Relations.
4. Charles H. Green presented Soliciting Customer Service Feedback: Motives Matter posted at Trust Matters.
5. Kate Baggott presented A Child-Friendly Restaurant for Grown Ups posted at Babylune.
6. Carolyn Manning presented Business Productivity Has Responsibilities posted at ProductivityGoal.
7. Robyn McMaster presented Hospitality Stirs Serotonin posted at Brain Based Biz, and
8. Service Untitled presented Does Customer Service Come Naturally To You?

My own writing for you this month:

• Value kick-off on Managing with Aloha: Ho‘okipa, the Hospitality of Complete Giving

• Value kick-off here on Talking Story: Talks a bit about my own history learning about Ho‘okipa at work in Hawai‘i.

• Then, in the Writing Elsewhere category, a bloggy kind of Ho‘okipa I wrote as a guest author: A Cracker Jack® prize for Steve, and Get in the Feedback Loop.
  

• Books on Hospitality. Still trying to grow this list! Help me out.
  

• Hospitality and the Comforts of Home, with Company. Within this post, I also tell you about Danny Meyer's concept that Service is Monologue; Hospitality, Dialogue.

• Send that Blackberry to Solitary Confinement. Not your home turf? That is no excuse to stop being hospitable.

• Make Sunday your Day to Comment. If Sunday commenting became your new practice, you would learn and gain much enrichment from our month within hospitality.

• “Most people think of hospitality as a social grace, something you remember to do like mom taught you, when you know guests are coming to visit.” Or maybe not... maybe we need A charge for the Ho‘okipa Brigade: Social Graces

• How to Capture an Expert’s Value: 12 Tips. With Ho‘okipa as our focus for the month, it seemed like the perfect time to bring back this article, one I had written for Lifehack.org just short of two years ago.

• Like my book inquiry, this is one I hope you continue to add to! What are your interview questions for the Mea Ho‘okipa?

• What does your customer dream about? Ho‘okipa Coaching of the Day – Deliver on the Promise.

• The Customer and You; Together at Last! Customers and the businesses they patronize have a peculiar type of relationship most times.

• Are you a Hospitalitarian? Are you a Mea Ho‘okipa? Mea ho‘okipa are tireless advocates and builders of community, and here’s something else to understand about them: They advocate and build as well as they do as a “selfish act.”

• This is about curing a kind of workplace cancer. The Hospitality Cancer? Routine.

My last link for you is that for Rapid Fire Learning on Joyful Jubilant Learning this month: Keep in mind that you can learn with us there in the welcoming arms of 19 contributing authors --- and still counting! See Dean Boyer's August Challenge.

BE Mea Ho‘okipa. Aloha.

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Postscript: I WILL ask again! Our next Ho‘ohana Community Forum will be on Joyful Jubilant Learning through-out the month of September. If you want to be sure you are sent an invitation to contribute there, let me know!

Do you really need more convincing? Try these, all found at Joyful Jubilant Learning:

1. Learning through Blog Forums
2. Writing, Blogging, Business, and Learning Through it All
3. Write to Learn; Slow, Steady, Sure

John Keoni had his June Break Thru already!

For our Ho‘ohana (work’s intention) this month, we coach each other to Kūlia, and Break Thrū!

If you are wondering where your own breakthrough could possibly come from this month, you must read this story, just shared with us on the Managing with Aloha blog by Uncle John Keoni.

Click on the picture to get there, then join Uncle John on the swings … June beckons.

Add Value to People

Tim Milburn is one of my heroes. Has been ever since I’ve known him. Tim inspires me.

Here is another reason why; Tim has done something fabulous yet again:

Add Value to People

For the next 103 days, I figure I can be in the Tim and Kerry parade doing one of their suggestions a day. Join me, for it’s pure aloha, freely given.

Click on the cover and download your copy today.

When Children Sleep, Angels Whisper

What follows is a new edit to a story I had written for Talking Story on the blog’s first December 6th. Last year, I linked back to it. This year, I print a newly edited version, for my daughter had asked me to write up “the part where our Papa Angel whispers to us at night.”

This is for her, and for all of us who knew and loved my dad. Perhaps it will help you think of someone you love as your December angel too.

[The picture below is of me and my dad at my wedding. Next year I celebrate my 24th wedding anniversary.]

Hau‘oli la hanau Dad, Happy Birthday.

---

December 6th will always mean just one thing to me: Today is my Dad’s birthday.

Dad is no longer with us; his was a life much too short. As we had explained to my young children the first Christmas we had without him, now sixteen years ago, heaven needs a lot of angels during this holiday season, and their Papa was one of those people who answered the call.

What we explained went something like this all the years when they were younger; now they know it by heart, so they can explain to their children one day in their own words, and with their mana‘o (what it means to them);

“The angels whisper in our ears while we are sleeping, so we dream the December dreams that reasonable people should dream right now. We want to be good, unselfish people who think with gratitude for what we have, way more than with wishfulness for what we don’t have. Angel whispers are soft and gentle, and they help our thoughts sleep well, unbothered by the noisy beating of our hearts which never sleep, and without the confusion life can bring when we’re awake. Ours should be the dreams of a baby born with all the glorious possibility of a wonderful life to come, just like the baby Jesus. Then, when we awake in the morning we are newly blessed, with the angel’s whisper mixing perfectly with our own aloha spirit. Papa is our personal angel, and because he went to heaven, his whispers can warm a lot of children’s hearts right now, not just ours.”

My dad had died two days before Thanksgiving, and those days which dutifully march between then and today, December 6th, we’ve since looked at as his ‘angel’s boot camp’ where every angel joins hands, hearts, and wings. They get the annual training they will need before our Lord sends them out to the world to help Santa, and help us, so that in turn we help each other, becoming angels on earth, practicing for the days we get our own wings.

Show you care with Blogidarity

There is a new project tailor made for the aloha and Mālama of the Ho‘ohana Community.

One day not so long ago, Felix Gerena, author of BrandSoul and a member of our Ho‘ohana Community, sent an email to me and the gentlemen of Team Synergy telling us about an idea which came to him while he was on a bus ride.

Felix’s idea was to use blogging for a higher purpose, that of helping others who are far less fortunate than we are.

Blogging is fun, blogging inspires writers, blogging stimulates interesting conversations, blogging markets business, blogging builds community … but what else? What can blogging achieve that is bigger than all of that, and really, truly, good and right?

From that bus ride, and Felix’s willingness to share his idea with a group of people obsessed with the idea of synergy and the Power of We, was born Blogidarity , the power of the blogging community harnessed to explode the worth of a single dollar, “Cause 1 $ can save a life.”

I am extremely proud to call myself a Blogidary in full support of this project of the blog Synergy, and what better month than this one, where we Ho‘ohana with Mālama, the Hawaiian value of caring, compassion and stewardship, for Blogidarity to become reality.

Visit www.Blogidarity.org today, read Ha’s story in our inaugural association with Clear Path International, and show your own Mālama — be bold, be a Blogidary too. The world needs you and your aloha.

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Our April Ho‘ohana: Mālama. What is Caring in business and at work?

Can you help me Articulate Aloha?

I just did a new post for the MWA Jumpstart Program, and in thinking about it a bit more, I would greatly appreciate some help from all of you in the Ho‘ohana Community when it comes to describing what you feel Aloha actually is.

I fully realize that it can be hard for new readers to get past the Hawaiian words I use: it’s my on-going challenge in writing online, especially for those who have not yet read Managing with Aloha. [Tip on that by the way, you can start with the manifesto first for a 28-page preview.]

However according to a mentor of mine, Peter Apo of NaHHA, the Native Hawaiian Hospitality Association, studies by linguists show that the two Hawaiian words most universally known, at least by the literate world, are Hawai‘i, the name of our state, and Aloha. 

So would you share with me what Aloha means for you? Not to give me any props on what you may have learned here, but for the benefit of those in the MWAJ program. I really think it would help them if they heard aloha articulated by someone besides me.

If you had to describe aloha to someone else, what would you say about it?

If you’d like to read it first, here’s the beginning of the MWA Jumpstart post I was referring to. However if you click away, do come back for I would truly appreciate your comments on this: What does aloha mean to you? How would you describe it?

From MWA Jumpstart:
When I coach managers and leaders who have made the commitment to manage with aloha, one of the first things I do is ask them to describe aloha for me the way they interpret it. When they use the word with the people they manage, their intention must be understood so that their expectations of aloha-filled performance are clear, in other words, there must be clarity in the workplace about their Language of Intention.

How can anyone take your cue if they aren’t sure what you mean? Read more here.

And in case you’re interested: Do you know what Hawai‘i means?

technorati tag: Aloha. click on the talking story category links in this post's footer.

Surfer rides again in Hale‘iwa

Yesterday morning I had a rare opportunity to read the morning paper over coffee, and this story got me so distracted I sat within my own reflections about it much too long; I was nearly late for an appointment.

I also realized I hadn’t posted another Story of Aloha for quite some time. So here’s a beauty.

Hale‘iwa sign’s surfer rides again.

Imagine being an audience of one, receiving joy

I received the most wonderful mahalo gift today.

Over the course of the last three months I have done six sessions on various Managing with Aloha lesson plans for an ‘ohana in business 40 people strong. This afternoon was our 6th and final session.

They have been terrific students. I have experienced such joy in their eagerness to learn. They have delighted me as they have written their exercises in the margins and open spaces of my book’s pages, turning down the corners where their Next Action steps will help them manage with aloha day by new day; Ka la hiki ola.

As I prepared to leave, wishing all a Merry Christmas, the room filled one more time with all those who had attended the sessions. They said they had a gift for me.

I received a beautiful yellow ginger lei, but best of all, the gift of song: They sang two Christmas carols for me, and not at all tentatively — they really belted them out, singing them with gusto. I was an audience of just one, but you would have thought they were auditioning for the conductor of the Honolulu Symphony.

The very best gifts never come wrapped in boxes.

Your pay is not necessarily what you’re worth.

I go for a run each morning. It’s a great way to start my day for a couple of different reasons; my health is but one of them.

On my morning runs during the summer break for school I miss seeing Kalani. It will be good to see him in late August when school starts up again.

Kalani drives a school bus. The bus yard is about 30 miles from where he starts to pick up the kids in my neighborhood, and to be sure he is never late, Kalani drives those first 30 miles to get here at least a half-hour earlier than he needs to. He doesn’t want to be late. You never know when something unexpected could delay him, traffic and all, and the very worst thing would be to keep an anxious child waiting for him.

So I usually first see Kalani parked on a quiet side street waiting for the exact time his pick-ups should start. He uses his early time to carefully and meticulously check his school bus. Sometimes I see him with a dustpan and small hand-broom, sometimes with a polishing cloth and spray bottle of cleaner, sometimes with a can of engine oil. When that first child gets on, Kalani wants to make sure they will walk into a bus that is spotless and safe.

But that’s not enough. The bus has to be warm and welcoming too. It has to be special. When you peer inside the front door of his bus, you also see that Kalani has jerry-rigged a couple of holders for fresh flowers from his yard, and that there’s a milk crate near his seat with children’s story books. Kalani especially loves Dr. Seuss.

I talked to Kalani for the first time when he was perched on a step stool outside the fourth or fifth window back from the front, cleaning off a smudge near the uppermost edge of the window. I had seen Kalani’s bus pass by when it was full of children, and I knew that there wasn’t a single child tall enough for that smudge to have entered into their normal sight line, so as I approached him I had said, “You really take good care of that bus.”

Kalani had answered, “It’s important that I do, for this bus takes care of me, and it takes care of our children. One day these children will have to take care of things too, so I best set a good example for them.”

Since that day I’ve talked to Kalani pretty often. Our conversations are short, but in some way, Kalani always seems to bring the subject back to the children, and to why his job is the most important job in the whole world. He’s often told me that he is a lucky man to have it, and to have the opportunity to take responsibility for the way the day will start for so many children. It is his Kuleana, and he loves that it is.

Kalani knows the name and age of every child on his bus. He knows who their favorite teacher is, and who their best friend is. He knows when it is their birthday, and he gets all the children to sing happy birthday on those special days. He knows when they get an A on a quiz, because they show it to him with pride, knowing that Kalani will make a huge fuss over them, and tell them how smart they are, and that he knew that they could do it.

I’ve often thought about all the parents of those children who’ve never met Kalani, yet they entrust him with their most precious possessions. They’re lucky too; they’re very fortunate that they simply lucked out in having Kalani assigned to our neighborhood route. They are very fortunate that Kalani takes personal responsibility for having their children start their school day in the best possible way.

One Monday I saw another driver, and I got worried that something had happened to Kalani, but turns out he had just gotten a bad cold. The next time I saw him, he explained that it was more important that he stayed home to get well, for it would have been horrible if he had made some child sick because they had caught his cold. He couldn’t risk that.

I don’t know exactly what Kalani gets paid to drive that bus. However I do know that his pay is nowhere near a reflection of his worth.

I don’t know how much of that pay Kalani is able to save and invest, or buy life’s luxuries with. However I do know that Kalani is a very rich man.

Related post: The Energy Flow of Kuleana.

Talking story, Genuine Curiosity and Baseball

“There are many kumu (teachers) and kūpuna (elders) who know much more than I; as charted by their own life’s course, they may tell you of more insightful experiences. I encourage you to listen to the stories that are shared by elders, for their lessons learned can inspire you, and may enrich your own understanding.”
—Managing with Aloha, page 19

Yesterday I received a wonderful May Lei from Dwayne Melancon. He wrote a very generous recommendation for Talking Story on his own blog, Genuine Curiosity - great name, don’t you think?

I read what Dwayne had written for a second time this morning, and it reminded me of a nice experience I had on Saturday afternoon at my son’s ballgame talking story with a kupuna (elder), Mr. Rivera.

Zach’s game was at the Ka‘u ball field. There are two short stacks of bleachers there, but no dugouts, so each team normally camps on the bottom rows of the bleachers. To give them their own space, all those who come to watch the game bring our own canvas beach chairs to perch on the hillsides behind the bleachers. With the normally bright Ka‘u sun, we usually have the better end of the deal sitting in the shade of the trees with great views of the field.

When I first spotted Mr. Rivera he was getting comfortable on a patch of grass about twenty feet away from me. He was dressed way too nicely for a ballgame, with a crisply pressed aloha shirt, dress shoes and slacks, so I didn’t expect him to stay too long and turned my attention to the game. However he was still there at the end of the second inning, and I noticed him again as he shifted to get more comfortable. I started feeling that I shouldn’t be the one with the canvas chair while an older man sat on the ground, and I offered my chair to him.

At first he declined, but at my insistence he took it, settling in gratefully. I sat down in the grass next to him at his left, and it didn’t take long at all for Mr. Rivera to start talking story.

I never would have guessed it just by looking at him, but turns out that Mr. Rivera was all of 95 years old, and he was there to watch his son at the game — the home plate ump, just turned 71.  Full rich lives, far from over.

Mr. Rivera has a passion for baseball, and he told me about his own playing years in plantation Hawaii, when the lunas (plantation bosses) would drive everyone to the ballpark in the cane haul trucks when their shifts were over, stopping at street corners to pick up their families on the way. He took his turn at coaching, and eventually he became the team manager. Much later, Mr. Rivera would be home plate ump all through his three sons’ games. He was sure to teach them much more than the rules of the game so they could once day take his place behind the plate. Things like consistency, fairness, professionalism, and how to handle unruly coaches.

Most of the time Mr. Rivera talked story without taking his eyes off the game. In his soft but certain voice he rhythmically called every play and pitch a split second before his son did, telling me his stories in the inning breaks when each team took the field. He cheered and spoke his admiration for every player having a great at bat or fielding with precision, and his delight was infectious when bases were successfully stolen. Bases loaded, the Waimea pitcher persisted, pitching three strikes for the third out, and Mr. Rivera spoke of the boy’s focus and determination with immense pride: Ho‘omau, he didn’t give up. He “won” the inning: loading up those bases before that critical moment didn’t matter. On the contrary, it created his defining moment.

I don’t know if I have ever enjoyed watching a game as much as I did Saturday afternoon with Mr. Rivera.

One of his best stories was about a playing season when attendance was particularly low at the games. His coach knew he had a great team, and he struggled to get his team better motivated when no one seemed to care about baseball enough to watch them anyway. In a flash of inspiration the coach had every player shave their heads to simply inject fun and novelty into the game, letting them play without caps in early evening games under the stadium lights. Before you knew it, more and more people came to watch, for they became known as the Bald-headed Baseball Boys. His own bald head was Mr. Rivera’s mark of distinction at school. That season’s attendance became one for the record books.

I learned some other things about Mr. Rivera and old Hawaii that had nothing to do with baseball but everything to do with the honesty and openness of talking story, even to a stranger. When I asked about his family, I learned he had been married twice, to both an older and younger sister in the same family. His first wife died at 24 when she got sick with food poisoning and the plantation doctors decided to operate, opening her up to check if they could see what was wrong.

However most of Mr. Rivera’s stories were enchanting, and he laughed at his own pleasure with the wonder of what his life has meant to him. To tell his stories was to re-live them. I got much better at asking him questions, and he’d smile at me and wait expectantly for the next one. His eyes were still on the game, but I knew his ears were for me.

Indeed, talking story and sharing our aloha with each other is a wonderful way to pass the time with someone.  Just like Dwayne says,

“After a great lunch conversation at a table full of people strangers thrown together at the conference, I commented on how cool it was that we'd had so much to talk about and share even though we'd never met before.”

“He tells me (how’s this for a cosmic nudge), ‘Yeah, I love talking story.’

So do I.”

Me too Dwayne.

Saturday was the last game of the season. Next year Zach will be at college, but I may take in another game now that I know where to find Mr. Rivera. I have a lot more to learn.

Related posts:  On Talking Story.  On Ho‘omau.

Fridays with the Alaka‘i Nalu

As I began to write the MWA articles that were posted on the 800-CEO-Read Blog yesterday, a memory came back to me and I wrote another story.

Ended up I didn’t use it for the 800CR Blog because it was too long, and I didn’t wish to eat up more of their column space than I needed to in fulfilling their expectations — they were already amazingly generous with me.

However I thought all of you would enjoy the story as we move into the weekend. I am about to embark on another fully-loaded travel schedule today, so until I return posting here on Talking Story may be light — good timing for a story of Aloha.

So here is the [completely true] story: It appears on Managing with Aloha Online, and is called Working and Living with Aloha. It is a story that will cause me to smile each time I read it, bringing back to my mind my Fridays with the Alaka‘i Nalu.

St. Patrick and The Menehune.

Do you know how many Irish there are living in Hawaii?

I don’t really know, and I couldn’t find an answer to it. I do believe there are many here of Irish descent. However living here all my life I can tell you that St. Patrick’s Day has traditionally gone by relatively unnoticed and uncelebrated here in the islands. Ask most people here what they think of today and they’ll say “green beer” and that’s about the extent of it. Come to think of it, that does lend itself to many spontaneous celebrations today...

However given my own mana‘o as connected with Managing with Aloha, and thanks to attending eight fairly formative years of Catholic School, what I recall about St. Patrick is this: he was very skilled at matching his evangelism (substitute: Rosa’s coaching) with the specific values of the Irish culture (substitute: Managing with Aloha.) So personally, I’m a fan!

This comes from The History Channel’s archives:

Familiar with the Irish language and culture, Patrick chose to incorporate traditional ritual into his lessons of Christianity instead of attempting to eradicate native Irish beliefs.
For instance, he used bonfires to celebrate Easter since the Irish were used to honoring their gods with fire. He also superimposed a sun, a powerful Irish symbol, onto the Christian cross to create what is now called a Celtic cross, so that veneration of the symbol would seem more natural to the Irish.

The way I see it, St. Patrick had a lot of aloha.

As an aside, there is another similarity between the folklore of the Irish and the Hawaiians: our storied little people. For the Irish it’s the leprechaun, and for the Hawaiians it’s the menehune, who are often described by malihini (visitors) as “the Hawaiian leprechaun.”

So for today, a story for you about our Hawaiian Menehune: click this next link to read The Three Menehune of Ainahou. Like St. Patrick and the Three Menehune, there are many in our world who wish to make things better for you.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Speaking of love and aloha.

Rosemary writes these stories about snippets of her life as a manager that simply blow me away. She did it again yesterday. (This was the last time.)

You must visit Wiz Speak and read about Mr. Fiorucci.

Business can be thought of as pretty cold, but businesses don’t have to be. The people in them can warm them up.

You never know when a customer, or a neighbor like Mr. Fiorucci, will start to be a person who thinks of your business, and the people in it, as part of their life. Just one more reason why malama (caring and empathy) and aloha belong in every business, and every workplace.

Hawaiian Technorati Tags: Aloha. Malama.

Preparing for Valentine’s Day.

That’s how today was traced on my calendar. Didn’t give it enough time, the time it deserved, I know.

Thankfully, I’ve actually been thinking about it for much longer now, with much mahalo, gratitude, to those who unknowingly may have forced the earlier musing upon me.

- I decided to talk about my own love affair with books in our monthly Ho‘ohana.

- I found an absolute steal in a bookstore: Annie Pigeon’s The Complete Love’s Little Instruction Book, marked down to only $1.00. She wrote it to help people “show your love how much you really care, every day, in thousands of big and little ways.”

- I was entrusted with the knowledge that a friend was going to elope on Valentine’s Day and I'm deliriously happy for her.

- I listened to a news story about how a whole retail bonanza has been created for those who strategically merchandise anti-love wares to Valentine’s Day haters. Poor things (the haters.)

- I talk about aloha alot, and I began to talk about it this way: aloha is about welcoming love into your life all year long.

- I think that thought came to me, because this seems to be a time in my life in which I have re-learned to cultivate friendship, investing in those relationships in some different ways than I did before. I’m loving it.

- My mom gave me a whole bag of Milk Chocolate Reese’s Peanut Butter Filled Hearts because she knows it’s my favorite candy.

- In a recent coaching session, all my client wanted to talk about was how Valentine’s Day is, in his opinion, the most stressful day of the year for men: he wanted some coaching from me on how to enjoy it for a change.

- Thinking about that, I happily realized that Valentine’s Day holds absolutely no stress for my husband at all anymore: over the years it’s become much easier to make me happy with much smaller things, things that don’t cost even a penny.

- I happened to read the most wonderful essay by M. Scott Peck, M.D. who wrote Dave’s beloved The Road Less Traveled, in which he talked about affection, friendship, and all the kinds of love that are not romantic love. After reading it, I felt incredibly rich.

- I found the most wonderful quote, for in my mind it connects ho‘ohana (which you know I’m kinda nuts about) with love:

“Effort matters in everything, love included. Learning to love is purposeful work.” — Michael Levine, quoted in Abounding Grace

And then this:
- Waiting for my daughter to get off work last week, I bought more Valentine’s Day cards on impulse than I ever have before. Next to Christmas cards, I’ve always loved to give them. Problem is, a lot of people don’t know how to receive them without questioning their motive. It’s sad when you want to embrace the emotion, but have to buy more generic. I find I buy both kinds, just because I want to.

So this morning for me is for addressing and mailing my Valentines. If you happen to get one from me — or from someone else — please don’t question our motives. Let it be enough to know that someone cares about you. Let it be that simple, and that good. Enjoy the aloha you have been given.

The greatest thing you might do for someone is giving them your gracious acceptance.

I have a challenge for you in these next two days leading up to Valentine’s Day:

“If you’d be loved, be worthy to be loved.” — Ovid

“Love for the joy of loving, and not for the offerings of someone else’s heart. — Marlene Dietrich

This is a time you should be enjoying, scratch that, loving, and I truly hope you do.

Hawaiian Technorati Tags: Aloha. Ho‘ohana. Mahalo. Ho‘okipa.

Teacher’s helper: a story of Aloha.

Have the good folks at Borders read our Ho‘ohana this month?
A Love Affair with Books.

Walked through the Kahala Mall today, and saw the huge posters of Borders Express new ad campaign for February:

“Books don’t mind
if you read other books;
That’s love.” 

Very cool.

Then I saw this great story: Teachers' wishes come true at Windward Borders shop. It’s a true story of aloha:

“When Borders Express assistant manager Lori Gomes learned that a teacher had to cancel a $1,000 book order because her funding had been redirected to other school budget priorities, Gomes decided she had to do something to help.” Read it here.

What are you doing with your once loved, but now idly shelved and forgotten books?

Tag: aloha. books.

More Stories of Aloha: Rosemary

A short post this morning, with the thought that I may provide you with some good reading if you have time to spare this weekend.

I’ve been doing some reading of my own, and I feel compelled to add to my Stories of Aloha category here on Talking Story, sharing a few recent blog posts that help us understand what aloha, the sharing of our spirit, is all about.

These Stories of Aloha are from Rosemary Rothacker of Wiz Speak.

First, you may want to meet Rosemary here.

This one will reveal the wonderful manager she is. (They all reveal that she’s a pretty special person.) Where is that Smell Coming From?

This is her Customer Service story, about Jim. Ho‘okipa at it’s purest.

And this one is called Laughter - The Best Medicine.

Rosemary, you are just the medicine we need.

On Ho‘okipa: “give me an example.”

This came up with one of my own customers during a coaching session yesterday, for she’d followed my post at Todd’s customer service forum and had some questions. So I gave her a few ideas on how ho‘okipa could become more pervasive in her own company, within her own circle of influence as a manager there. She soon chimed in with ideas of her own: it was a great brainstorming session, filling us both with optimism about her prospects.

Afterwards, I remembered a post I’d written back in December that was a wishful thinking kind of thing about a bank here in Kona. For some reason I never posted it: looking back it may just have been the holidays catching up with me or other things grabbing headline space when I came back from my ho‘omaha.

Who knows, maybe this was just meant to be saved for now. Unfortunately, being that it’s Friday, I’d bet this little scene, minus the holiday flavor, is playing out in banks in nearly every city across our islands. Here it is.

Not sure what I was thinking at the time, but I went to the bank the Friday before Christmas. I’d promised my daughter, away at college, that her early Christmas gift would be some cash in her account, and without one of her personalized deposit slips the ATM machine outside the bank building couldn’t help me. Walking through the entry door, I saw the line starting to circle the Christmas tree well beyond the normal ropes, and I reluctantly took the last spot, resigned to my fate.

We easily outnumbered the tellers 6 to 1 and counting — I wasn’t at caboose for long — for there were only three of them. I was a good little customer; my paperwork was pre-done, my driver’s license was out if the teller needed it, and I’d even taken my sunglasses off for the security cameras. Having nothing else to do but wait, I looked around, and noticed what most people in line at a busy bank notice:

- Beyond the tellers, another four employees in the back office, clearly seen working on other things through the slatted divider, desperately wishing it was a solid wall instead.

- A supervisor, also busy, lifting her eyes occasionally to check on the tellers, but amazingly blind to the ever-growing line.

- The specialists: three employees who take care of things like safety deposit boxes, loans, and personal banking for really wealthy customers, seated at their desks without anyone, but with lots of preoccupation.

- The teller closest to my place in line has a name plate that says TELLER IN TRAINING. However she seems to be holding her own pretty well, and on her face is consternation (that’s as good a word as any for it.)

Now you know what I was thinking. Aren’t these people cross-trained? Can’t they see this LINE? Am I the only one who feels sorry for these tellers, even though they won’t smile at us anymore?

The line wasn’t moving all that fast, and so I noticed something else. There was a framed Vision Statement on the side wall. The heading said, KINA ‘OLE, something I’d remembered Dr. George Kanahele defining as “flawless performance,” and underneath it were a few sentences I don’t now recall verbatim, which said something to the effect of striving to do things the right way, at the right time, and right the first time.

However, it didn’t say anything about doing the right thing in the first place.

It didn’t say anything about doing the Aloha thing.

So as I often do, I started a pretend story in my head. Imagine this:

Leialoha knows she’ll be shift supervisor at her bank during the lunch crunch today, the Friday before Christmas. On her way to work she stops at the grocery store, because she remembered seeing the plastic tubs of Christmas cookies they’d put out, and what a deal, only $7.99 for 3 dozen cookies. Santa faces and holiday wreaths; very festive. She’d tried the sample they offered; ono (delicious) too.

The morning flies by. Momi calls in that her son is sick, and phone calls to get another teller comes up short. Just as Leialoha knew it would, the lunch crunch hits right on time: at 11:30am the line of customers starts to circle the Christmas tree beyond the ropes.

Beyond the divider, Lauren notices too. She decides the work on her computer screen can wait; she was a teller once, and she knows what it’s like. She gets a bank drawer and opens another teller window, beckoning to the next person in line. She greets him warmly, and smiles to herself as she sees the relief on the faces of everyone behind him.

And what’s this? Leialoha is on the other side of the counter! She’s offering her tub of Christmas cookies to those in line, saying “Merry Christmas!” “Have a cookie while you wait.” “Mahalo plenty for your patience.” She is working and living with aloha, and we all feel so much better.

Everyone in the line is smiling now. It’s the right thing.

For another bank story, one that is true and very heartwarming, click over to Todd's right now, and read the one Rosemary wrote about Jim.

You've got a double treat there at Business Thoughts today, for Dave has one too!

Coaching with Storytelling.

Managing with Aloha is excerpted in the Honolulu Star Bulletin’s thINC. feature this morning:

The boss, island style. (not a direct link, once there, click on Think Inc. in the left column)

“Your own belief that the people you manage are innately good is the single most important prerequisite to your own success as their manager.”

The business editors of The Star Bulletin had chosen the excerpt after reading Managing with Aloha for themselves. The effect of the story they picked (an early aha! for me in regard to how others see aloha) has continued to surprise me. In fact, it wasn’t one of the stories I included in my first draft of the book. As I wrote it, my editor would continually encourage me to add more stories, and I am very grateful to him for his insistence, for when people now talk to me about Managing with Aloha, it is usually about one of the stories within it.

What I enjoy most, is when they’ll say, “I had something similar happen to me” and start to tell me a story of their own. We all have our own stories, and as managers we find that telling example stories is one of the best ways we teach and coach. The trick is to stop thinking of your own experiences as episodes, trials or tribulations --- think of them as relatable coaching stories. And be brave: make them personal, where they are about you and your own learning curve. Your staff loves knowing you weren’t always perfect!

Lord knows I wasn’t (and I’m not now!). I bumbled a lot along the way. This morning’s SB article is a story of one of those times. My sincere mahalo to the Star Bulletin writers for presenting and packaging it so well. Editors are wonderful!

By the way, if you haven’t had a chance to play with my Talking Story categories, you may want to start with the one called “Stories of Aloha.” Scroll down the left column for the link.

Papa's Shopping Angel Story.

December 6 will always mean just one thing to me: it is my Dad’s birthday.

Dad himself is gone now, his was a life much too short. As we’d first explained to my young children that first Christmas we had without him 15 years ago, heaven needs a lot of angels during this holiday season, and their Papa was one of those people who answered the call.

And as many stories do, especially when they are told as a way to comfort someone, and help the hurting heart remember another, this one has taken on a life of its own. The telling of “Papa’s Shopping Angel Story” is a December tradition where fact and fantasy has eagerly meshed together, spreading its own of Christmas cheer and adding a kind of magic to these early weeks of the month where even Santa must go through panic attacks as days are marked off the calendar.

Papa’s Shopping Angel Story is also one that is not told in one sitting; it’s become the background music singing in our heads for a few weeks, always lasting through the entire Christmas season. Sometimes it starts around Thanksgiving, but always, as sure as the sun comes up that morning, December 6 is the day we start to tell it to each other out loud. Everyone in the family does it, and from up in heaven, Dad makes sure none of us misses a beat in preparing for Christmas day.

You see one of the true facts we all knew about my Dad, was that he was that very rare man who loved going shopping. My dad was thought of as a fairly low-key, quiet and reserved gentleman, but shopping became a social event for him after he had retired from his full-time job. He was up bright and early every single Sunday to read the paper, for that was the day the front page was usually only a protective covering for a ream of flyers and advertisements. If by chance it was raining (other than on Mauna Kea, there’s no snow in Hawaii!) Dad got up extra early to meet the delivery boy and make sure the paper didn’t get wet.

There was this unwritten rule that no one could touch the familiar yellow Long’s Drugs Ad until Dad had peeled the rest of the paper’s clutter away from it and studied it with his morning coffee before we headed out to church. After church, Dad dropped us off at home, and went shopping. In the weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas, Dad’s Sunday ritual became a near-daily event: no one enjoyed the both the glitz and genuine caring of the season more than Dad.

Dad knew every cashier by name in every retail store in Pearl City, the neighborhood we lived in. And they knew him. The rest of us were just “Jerry’s family” to most of them, but they all knew what we were getting for Christmas, and exactly why my Dad felt it was the perfect gift for us. They knew if we deserved it because of something special we did – and the entire story that went with it – or if it would be under the tree Christmas Day only because Dad loved us. On my own shopping excursions days later, I’d get accustomed to the all-knowing looks my way, or hearing a cashier say, “you lucky girl, just wait until you see what Santa will bring you this year!”

There’s so much else involved with Papa’s Shopping Angel Story. We all loved to go shopping with him (when we were allowed to) because in the frenzy of the season we were positive there was an angel perched on his shoulder: the man could quickly find the perfect parking spot no matter how hectic the shopping weekend, no handicap sticker required. His research had paid off, and he found the deals of the century: if you bought something with him it was guaranteed not to show up cheaper somewhere else. Dad was my own personalized search engine long before Google’s founders were out of diapers.

So this morning, I woke up very early, instantly realizing I was already late with some of my own holiday preparations and had to get started with loving and relishing every day that is left in this wonder-filled month.  Heart, mind and soul must be completely open for every single thing December has to offer me.  I can’t go wrong with Dad’s angel on my shoulder.

I know you’re busy. So am I. But believe me, I love my job and what I do just as much as you do, and there are still those faultingly-human times I kid myself into believing I’m indispensable too. However, this is one of the rare times you’ll hear me say, Let the business go: trust that the investments you’ve made all year long will help it survive on its own. And whatever you do, DO NOT start any new projects this month, adding to anyone else’s plate. If you ask for extra time off, and your boss lays a guilt trip on you about it, ignore it, smile, and hand him or her a candy cane while you say mahalo (thank you), Mele Kalikimaka Kakou! (Merry Christmas for all of us.)

Enjoy the month.
Enjoy the hunt for that parking space.
Enjoy the double bagging to hide brand names, and pretending the latch to the car trunk is busted so you can stash your lunch-break purchases. 
Enjoy the wonder of plastic and your great credit rating.
Enjoy sweeping up falling pine-needles and perfectly re-stacking the gifts you just wrapped so the bows don’t get crushed.
Get your family to sit around the dinner table and not in front of the TV, so you can start telling the snippets of your own family Christmas stories and love each other.

And by the way, since Dad’s not here anymore, say a few kind words to all those store employees working so hard to make Christmas as merry as they can for us. Since I’m here on O‘ahu right now, I’m filling up the gas tank and driving out to Longs Drugs in Pearl City. Dad will help me find a great parking space, I know he will.

Websites, Weblogs, and LipSticking: a Story of Aloha given.

When I decided to develop a website for Say Leadership Coaching, there were two things I did to start designing it: I went on the hunt for a good webmaster, and I went web-surfing, reading as many business web sites as I possibly could. I had a Word doc file in one open window that had two columns to log the results of my research: the heading on one column said “my reaction as a customer” and the other said “jollies or good business?” so that I’d be realistic about what was cool versus right for my coaching business.

Luckily for me, it didn’t take me too long to discover weblogs, and Talking Story was born to complement SayLeadershipCoaching.com, the static website done for me by my webmaster (who is both cool and good!) Before I hit that magic make-this-blog-public button for Talking Story, I became a commenter on other blogs: they were so seductive, I just couldn’t resist. Well, good thing. One of the very first blogs I was brave enough to comment on was Lipsticking, Smart Marketing to Women Online, written by Yvonne DiVita, for she seemed to be so genuine, warm, and welcoming. And, “what’s not to like about that?”

Yvonne has proved to be very worthy of my trust and the trust of all newbie bloggers, for she has such aloha for us and this conversational medium. Lipsticking has led me to many other blog discoveries, and both Yvonne’s posts and her ‘ohana in business (i.e. the professional community she has created) have challenged me with new learning in marketing not only to women, but to everyone. On Lipsticking, you will find Yvonne has blog rolls titled More Marketing Online, Small Business Advice, Knowledge Management, Jane Speaks, and Just For Fun. In September, 2004, the Rochester Women’s Network announced they had selected Yvonne as an “Up and Coming Business Woman of the Year” and on her bio, she reveals her mana‘o (who she really is and her true goal).

Yvonne is an author, with dreams for the author in all of us, and she has written a book of her own called Dickless Marketing, Smart Marketing to Women Online. I've included it in my BookList to the right for you.

So today, akin to the feeling one gets when acknowledged by one of their mentors, it is my honor to be featured on Yvonne’s blog as her Smart Woman Online Interview. Click on over and get a taste of Yvonne’s warmth and aloha for yourself. We had great fun, and I must thank Yvonne for her wonderful interview: she made it so easy for me, and she was very gracious. There was a lot to like about that!

Mahalo nui Yvonne.

By the way, when you have more reading time, grab a cup of coffee and review the other interviews Yvonne has done in her series: she has a knack for connecting with truly fascinating business people, willing to share so much of their mana‘o with us.

This world-wide web is still about people, and the way we reach out for each other.

Since starting Talking Story, I’ve had a few people ask me why posting a very public weblog doesn’t “concern” me. There are two main reasons it doesn’t: One is that I am fascinated with the whole global capacity of community, perhaps too fascinated to be more cautious. Second, I figure I’m the one starting the conversation, and if I have good intent in that beginning, all will be well.

Talking Story is only two months old, but in its prior email editions, Ho‘ohana has been forwarded to many people I don’t know for over a year now, and I’ve never had a bad experience with those who do contact me. On the contrary, they continually reinforce my belief that people inherently want to act from a place of good intent too—and will when you give them the opportunity. I’ve met some pretty special people just in the short two months Talking Story has been published.

It happened again today. I received a wonderful email from a new subscriber, who after doing the safely anonymous, privacy-protective subscription thing I’ve set up for the Ho‘ohana Community, went one step further. He chose to introduce himself in a personal message, telling me about the new career journey he’s on, and a bit about his life as a result of his new choices.

As part of his message, he told me about the place in which he lives, describing it as,

“gorgeous, mountain views, beautiful clouds, storms, sunsets, flaura and fauna. When I have my down day or two, I try to focus on all that I have.”

After I read his message, I was compelled to walk outside, sit on my lanai for a few moments, and just drink in all that was simple, natural, and right in my world. Quite a gift to get from someone I’ve just met who chose to reach out, talk story with me, and not stay anonymous.

Another person I “met” recently is Charlie O’Shields, who publishes his own weblog called Always Curious, a World of Wonders. Charlie inspires me daily with the eye he levels on our world, and his extraordinary talent for capturing its splendor. Charlie “writes” his blog with photography, and tonight he posted one of the most spectacular pictures I’ve ever seen—you must take a look at his Primary Colors.

Look around you this weekend and enjoy your world too. We’ll get back to the business side of life on Monday … or perhaps Tuesday…

Flour and Flair. and Aloha.

"Flour and Flair" was one of those feel-good stories of Aloha in our Sunday West Hawaii Today.
Da Cake Lady: you need to subscribe to read the full article, but subscription is fast and free. Some excerpts:

Kailua-Kona resident Stephanie Charlton began her cake ministry six years ago after being impressed by the service she received at the Kona Post Office.

"I vowed in my mind to bring them a huge delicious cake as a token mahalo," she said. "Well, that one gesture on that one occasion launched my cake ministry, which now serves Kona and beyond."

Charlton delivers cakes to about 30 organizations, as well as 30-40 individuals, and she mails cakes to the mainland. The fire department, police department, post office, First Hawaiian Bank and car dealerships are just a few of the organizations who have the opportunity to taste her confectionery treats.

Many times people get upset or frustrated because Charlton won't let them pay her, she said.

"I feel like I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing with my time. I'm happiest when I can contribute something to the life of another person," she said. "Just to walk in a room and see their faces light up when they see the cake is worth it."

About every other week Charlton goes to Costco to stock up on supplies. Although she said she doesn't know exactly how much she spends, she would estimate about $300 or $400 a month. "But it's not about money," she said. "It's about serving and uplifting people."

"I'm happy to be doing it, I'm happy to be in Hawaii and I'm happy with this time of my life," she said. "Whether it turns commercial or remains a ministry, as long as I'm able to make cakes, I will."

I hope this will inspire you to reap this kind of wonderful, heartfelt recognition and appreciation from your own customers. Wouldn't you love to be a Kona business that can say, "Oh yes, we've been visited by Da Cake Lady."

If you do subscribe to West Hawaii Today to read the full article, take this link for the write up on my son Zach's Saturday football game too. Between Zach and the UH volleyball games I was truly in sports mode this weekend.

But now I'm thinking about the last time I baked a cake ... it's time for me to be the customer that says thank you too.

Stories of Aloha

Love it when the morning news has a better balance of good stories than bad.

One story today was on the ground-breaking for construction of a new hospital wing at Castle Hospital on O‘ahu. The redesigned patient rooms of the wing will be enlarged for the new technology that surrounds hospital beds (today hospitals can offer way more than that swing table for your meal) translating to greatly improved patient care. The story of aloha is that $300,000 of the construction budget was contributed from assorted fundraisers held by hospital employees wanting to do their part to make it happen. How great is that! Aloha for their patients, aloha for their employer.

Story two was on second-grade teacher Diane Kato at Alvah Scott Elementary being recognized as Teacher of the Year by WalMart with a $10,000 contribution to the school’s educational funding. The coverage done on the recognition event at Alvah Scott for Kato was heart-warming; the school’s auditorium was filled to the brim with an aloha that simply radiated from the TV screen.

WalMart gets a lot of heat: some may be justified, some comes with the territory (a path they chose, risks and all), and some is because it’s too easy for others to take shots at the Big Guy. Cynics could say, “only $10,000? Cheap publicity.” Sure, it’s a type of marketing, but I say its smart marketing done with aloha for the community they’re in. It took a greater investment in time and in preparation: imagination the nomination process and administration of the contest, touching every elementary school in the islands. Far cheaper and easier to spend less printing flyers in a direct mail campaign that floods mailboxes, clutters parking lots and creates more ōpala (rubbish). WalMart is already on a profit roll and could have done nothing. Aloha, given in any measure, creates more abundance. The expressions on the children’s faces in that Alvah Scott celebration proved it.

Just think what you can do.