Content or Discontent - Which Tent Do You Live In?

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Comments

[Rosa Say]

Tim, this is outstanding.

As I began to read, I thought to myself, “Tim is talking about Pono” for the word contentment (a favorite of mine!) looms large in MWA within that value— it’s the last chapter of the book because it’s a place at which we must arrive; learning, finding balance and what feels right to us, and finding contentment.

Yet I love how you take a word which first seems negative —discontent— then explain how we can learn from the hunger within it too. Seems to me you’ve described a lot of people within this Ho‘ohana Community of ours, and given them quite a bit of affirmation.

And I must add that your writing here is “most excellent,” as Dave would say. Paradox and parable blend so Timriffically!

[Starbucker]

Tim, I second Rosa's motion on this post. I equate your "balanced" view to what I call "half-fullism", in that we're always trying to keep that "teeter-totter" off the ground, both in how we learn and how we live. Your approach was unique to me in the use of discontent and content - points of view I had not considered before. Well done, and thanks.

[Dave]

Rosa, can we please extend this month a few weeks? Everyone is putting on their best "Sunday go to meeting dialogue!" and looooking gooood!

Tim,

The scales of balance have followed me from the first day I was born. (no there wasn't a second day :-) The introspection that must absolutely follow reading your work here is golden!

[Steve Sherlock]

Tim, I am coming late to the party but I'll second what has been said. I find walking the line you describe a challenge and a worthy one.

What a month September has been!

[Rosa Say]

Aloha Tim,
I felt drawn back to your article this evening, for I’ve given more thought to your final questions, and how I might “live in both tents.” Two things immediately come to mind for me, and they are the two things probably most important in my life; my family (especially my children) and my work with the MWA coaching curriculum and project teams.

I’ve arrived at great contentment with both work and family, for there are so many ways I realize I wouldn’t change a single thing, and truly don’t want for more. I absolutely love my life, and count my blessings daily. Even having “little” means having more focus on what’s right and worth my attentions. Yet with both work and family I instinctively and obsessively cannot stop looking for ways to make things better. Cannot stop, and will never stop.

‘Ae, (yes) my two tents have their flaps butted right up to each other so I stay dry with a foot in each when the rain starts to fall!

[John Richardson]

Great article Tim. I must say the older I get the more content I get with certain things in my life. That being said, the discontent side is increasing in other areas. I think that is what learning is all about.

When you are passionate about something, discontent with the status quo is always present. You want to be better, go faster, and reach heights never before attained.

I think the main thing to be "content" with is yourself. Realize who you are and what you are all about. Don't try to be someone else. Then you can be radically discontent with what you are passionate about and go and change the world!

John

[tim]

These are terrific comments. As I think about it more on a personal level, I am coming to believe that my discontentedness will be much more effective and well-intentioned if I am grounded in contentedness with myself.

Which reminds me of something...

When I was about 21 I went to see a psychic who told me that I would be broke and disappointed until I turned 40. I asked what would happen when I turned 40? To which the psychic responded, "Well, then you'll get used to it!"

I'm still thinking about this paradox...

[Greg Balanko-Dickson]

I live in both. I think of them as "neccessity" and possibility". When I am in the tent of discontent, I am thinking about the neccessity of change. When I am in the tent of content, I am think about what is possible - I agree it is about managing the 'tension' between the two.

I also tend to work on different projects in my business depending on which tent I am in...

[Chris Owen]

Tim
What a STUNNER of an article.
REALLY got me thinking. I know that contentment flows at times from some elements of my life. But in others the destructive internal voices can wreak havoc on any attempts at contentment.
But the discontent that I know drives my passion and my desire for improvement (and sometimes tumbling into perfectionism) was always a negative but here you've put a whole new spin on it.
LOTS of thinking here
A truly excellent post.

[Chris]

Tim, a very thought provoking piece. As a Christian I think Paul had his feet in both 'tents' (he was a tent maker by trade). He was discontent with being constrained in prision, but had learnt to be content with it as he knew that in all things God 'worked them out for good' (Rm 8:28). Thus, being content for the Chrtistian is not simply a quite and resigned acceptance of one's circumstances, but rather an knowledge that God can and will bring you through no matter what those are. This is the peace that passes all understanding to which Paul and Jesus refered. For non-Christians the key to having feet in both camps is simply this. Be content with what you have but never accept it as being all you will ever have. It may grow or it may decrease. Strive to change yourself for the better before you seek to change others or your circumstances. Always look for the best in all things and in all people no matter how bad it or they may be. Seek to build up and not tear down. Follow the 99 % rule. Find the 1% good in someone and praise them 99% for it. You will find this encouragment is enough to help you and them begin to grow.

[Joanna Young]

Rosa, thanks for sharing this article again. Tim, I think I get it now.