Learning to Listen? Learn what to Listen FOR

Skip Angel has a great post over at his Random Thoughts of a CTO on being a better listener. As I read through his article, I couldn’t help thinking that one of the things we need to get better at as managers is learning what in the world we’re listening for.

Our world is so complicated, frenetic and jumbled up at times: there’s just so much stuff out there vying for our attentions and making a lot of noise. While we can normally focus on who we should be listening to, it gets harder and harder to focus on what we have to listen to, and what we should be listening for.

For instance, one of the best tips I ever got from one of my bosses was about something he called the Pronoun Test. He’d say that if the pronouns often heard when employees spoke were “me” “you” and “I” we may have a morale issue where everyone was out for him or herself. However if the pronouns heard were “we” “us” and “our” we were in far better shape, with employees feeling they were an integral part of the company, willing to take ownership and more personal responsibility.

In Managing with Aloha, I write a bit more about this with Kākou, “the language of we.”

The language of we stimulates ownership and personal responsibility in the all-encompassing initiatives of a company. If you hear your employees talk about “our company” versus “the company” you know you’re on the right track. They feel they have a stake in what you do, and they take actions they believe are important and worthwhile. They are your partners, and those words of inclusiveness imply that they feel their voices and opinions are considered carefully in the decisions you make. The language of we is one of collaboration and partnership, and it also implies agreement and support of your vision. These are the words, the empowering force, and the strength of mind of Kākou.

Language cues can be very revealing. I recently attended a presentation where a work team was asked to introduce themselves to the audience. Turns out that they all reported to the same person, and after the first person said, “My name is ___, and I work with ___,” it became a running theme and cause for laughter, for everyone said the same thing—or did they?

“My name is John, and I work with Brian.”
“My name is Jason, and I work for Brian.”
“My name is Christie, and I work under Brian.”
“My name is Laurie, and I work under Brian.”
“My name is Tricia, and I work with Brian.”

I later commended Brian on the presentation they had done (which was very good), and I asked him, “Brian, just curious, who on your team do you count on the most and normally consider your go-to people?” He responded, “Oh no question, that would be John and Tricia.”

Coincidence?

When you introduce a new concept or company innovation, the listening you do in the organization in the days and weeks which follow should be cued in for reaction and responsiveness. Is your initiative a frequent or infrequent cause of the buzz? What are the emotions you hear? Are people concerned about it, or excited about it? Is there any connection being drawn to overall company mission and vision? Is there confusion to be cleared up? Or is there the worry, fear and apprehension of silence?

Just something to think about.

Do read Skip’s post. He calls it, Are you listening to me?

Comments

[Ken Partain]

Great post Rosa. I have worked in both environments, one where everyone was out for him or herself and another where everyone was included and respected. Not only did I really enjoy the later, we were so much more successful and really enjoyed what we were doing. The management team really listened to the input of others in the company and took it into consideration when it was time to make a decision. It was a collaborative effort which reaped many rewards, not only to the bottom line but to the self-esteem of each person involved.