Kuleana, the Value of Personal Responsibility

Aloha mai kākou ~ welcome to Managing with Aloha Coaching and the month of February.

You will find that our value of the month study is very much about my heart, my mission, and about the elemental basics and core principles of why the Managing with Aloha workplace philosophy exists. This month we study a value that is exceptionally strong for me personally, and stubbornly so; it takes over my entire life quite easily, suppressing all my other values if I allow it to.

My family and my employees have loved me for it. I can also drive them crazy with it. At day's end there are often entries in my Gratitude Journal, where I am immensely grateful that the love trumps so much!

This is not a value I am able to write about without it becoming very, very personal. Therefore, I am going to take advantage of that, and this is not a month where there will be a cautious editor's covering of diplomacy on the writing I spill out here. After all, is this not February, the red-hot month of love, including the self-love of your most passionate intentions? Let's seize the moment: If not today, then when?

Usually I nalu it, and go with the flow in the writing I do for this site, so I can be more responsive to the happenings of the day (you've been able to tell, I know). However not this time: I have pre-written more for the month to come than I ever have before, crafting the articles to come with the intention of my ho'ohana. Today is Day One of a value study that I have created in the deep hope that those with a calling for management make this value very, very personal for them too.

I pray my dear reader, that you are that person. We need you.

Our value for the month of February 2008, is presented in Chapter 10 of Managing with Aloha;
It is pronounced Coo.lay.ah.na, with a short emphasis on that third syllable.

Kuleana One’s personal sense of responsibility. I accept my responsibilities, and I will be held accountable. ~ Kuleana is the value of responsibility.  It drives self-motivation and self-reliance, for the desire to act comes from accepting our responsibility with deliberance and with diligence. ~ Responsibility seeks opportunity. Opportunity creates energy and excitement. ~ Kuleana weaves empowerment and ownership into the opportunity that has been captured. ~ There is a transformation in Kuleana, one that comes from ho‘ohiki, keeping the promises you make to yourself. When Kuleana is a strong personal value, it drives us. We take initiative and we motivate ourselves; others need not stoke a fire that already burns within us: We have ample fuel, and that fire burns red hot and steady.

To be a manager is to touch the lives of others in profound ways. As a manager, you must accept this responsibility. With care. With Aloha.
~ From my Core 21 Beliefs at www.ManagingWithAloha.com

Are you a manager? Are you meant to be one?

I am going to focus on You: the Manager We Need this month.  My postings for MWAC (this site) will not be as life-in-general as Pono was in January.

I am taking my own coaching in this from a German writer, scientist and philosopher who walked our earth 176 years before we did: His name was Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, and I quote him in the very front of my book to set the tone for the reader, with my single intention in writing it:  My Managing with Aloha epigraph reads:

“Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you help them to become what they are capable of being.”

I have very strong feelings about the Role of the Manager if our workplaces are ever to improve, and we will talk about them this month as Kuleana, your responsibility as both a manager and a leader. Starting with this posting, I have created Role of the Manager as one of the categories of the site, for it is one of the key concepts of the MWA workplace philosophy, if not THE key philosophy: In my thinking, the values of Aloha (unconditional love) and Ho'ohana (worthwhile work) and the Role of the Manager form a triangle of optimism each manager works with constantly.

For now, imagine that triangle forming the logs of the fire described in the definition of Kuleana above.

Your MWAC Engagement: Comments versus Email

Managing with Aloha Coaching is a complimentary site: It's completely free, because I want you to read it. Simply said, I want more Aloha in the world because Aloha is pure good. Subscription is recommended for your convenience, and because I write a type of continuous conversation with you each month, but it is not required.

I write for MWAC because I am hoping to help those who have read my book, who feel they can start to systematically bring Aloha to their work culture largely on their own. For whatever reason — cost, distance, lack of knowledge with virtual tools, reticence — they doubt they will ever hire me as their coach.

Since making the transition to this site from www.managingwithaloha.com (now used primarily as a portal for my book sales) comments shared publicly have gone down, and my email has increased quite a bit. I understand that, fully realizing I am largely broadcasting here, writing for managers who by nature are keeping their results to themselves, results pretty specific to their own workplace. My stats also show me that several of you now pull the MWAC feed into your own intranets and private wikis, and you discuss them there within your own teams, and not here on the site itself.

Both of those things are fantastic: I love your emails, and I love knowing that my articles are getting talked about! However I have to say, I would love to figure out how I can pry you out of hiding so that everyone else will benefit from it as well.

An Experiment: One of those pilots I love to test!

Thinking about this, I'm going to conduct a pilot for MWAC in February: A pilot is an idea you temporarily test, then make a decision about later when time serves up some data for you.

My pilot does connect back to Kuleana. I know that responsibility is a more private thing, and that managers may take a chance here, commenting on the responsibility they will (or will not) accept when there is a good chance their employees, peers, or boss can read the site too.

Therefore, you will see that I have removed the Recent Comments listing this month, for with Kuleana I encourage you to write to me privately as you have questions. I will respond to you privately, and I will not expose what you share with me in future postings here unless I ask you first, and we agree in how I will present it to both fully respect your privacy and be of help and usefulness to the other readers here in our Ho'ohana Community. You will still be able to comment on all my postings this month should you wish to (and I hope you will share what you are comfortable with!) it is just the comment index which previously appeared beneath the "Recent Postings" has been taken away so your name is not so publicly listed.

In case you missed it last month, here is an example of how I did use an email conversation in January, with the writer's permission: Is Pono where integrity goes?

Our February Agenda for Sunday Mālama

This month will be one I present a mini-study every Sunday, similar to that I had done back in October, which was devoted to a 4-Article Series on MWA3P: an overview of the Productivity Coaching we do at Say Leadership Coaching. [Scroll down for the links on my article index page if you missed it.]

Be sure you check back for the first article two days for now: Our February Sunday Mālama will kick off our Braver Experiments [with] Digital Learning initiative for 2008. This IS connected to Kuleana and The Role of the Manager: To handle both, you have to "get with the program."

I hope I have been able to get you as excited about the month to come as I am!

Tomorrow I will help you get started with your 5-Beat Rhythm [Click here for the template].

This February, Value your Month, and Value your Life, right here with us on Managing with Aloha Coaching. If you are a manager, this is the month to explore what a "calling for management" really, truly means to you. If it IS your calling, I promise you this: Kuleana is a value you will LOVE.
Let’s Ho‘ohana,
~ Rosa Say

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First time here? Welcome! I hope you like what you have read so far, and will be joining us!

You may want to read this article too: The How-To Read and Use Managing with Aloha Coaching

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Photo Credits: "Ignition" and "Light it up" by young_einstein

Comments

[Joanna Young]

Rosa, this value makes a strong connection to me. It was one I tried to practice when I was managing teams directly.

I no longer do that but still have management challenges - mainly managing myself! - but also managing relationships with people I'm working with, and with customers and clients.

I'm sure there will be rich learning for me here too.

Joanna

[Rosa Say]

"I'm sure there will be rich learning for me here too."

Thank you for saying so Joanna, for though the *system* is broken, pulling many people into management for the wrong reasons, I also believe there are many, many people who are not in management or leadership *positions* and should be - they do have a calling for it, that is regarded and as a "knack for certain things" which gets too easily dismissed because they don't get the Ho‘ohana space to explore their talents in the workplace. Creating this "Ho‘ohana space" is one of the things we'll talk about in the Role of the Manager.

Like motivation, I encourage people to first put the self- prefix in front of the words for a new Language of Intention: Self-management and self-leadership take on a whole new meaning (and self-motivation within Kuleana).

Mahalo Joanna, for kicking off the discussion! And by the way, you set a magnificent example of someone who positively affects so many other people with the attention you devote to your self-managing! We can all learn from you.

[Dear readers, please do take the link to Joanna's name above if you have not yet visited her website.]

[Rosa Say]

Aloha everyone, I wrote above:

"My stats also show me that several of you now pull the MWAC feed into your own intranets and private wikis, and you discuss them there within your own teams, and not here on the site itself."

...and got an email that I will share anonymously :) "You caught us Rosa! Tell me what you think about our conversations!"

As I responded to the message, I can't read them unless you send me an invite and passcode to your network (which you probably can't if it's hosted by your employer), so your privacy is safe - as it should be. I will see your network url in my visitor stats when someone within your wiki clicks on a link back to my articles (that's how I know), but if I try to click on it, I will get a 404 code page, or another message that I have no access.

So again, if it is a great conversation, and one that you can share in some way with the rest of us, summing it up here as lessons-learned versus a he said/she said conversation, please do!

[Rocky]

Here is a good quote I found on our need to be responsible for our actions:

A person's success lies not with the stars but with themselves. We must carry on the fight of self correction and discipline. We must fight mediocrity as sin and live against the imperative of life's highest ideal- Frank Curtis Williams.

We have to take responsibility for ourselves and our actions. I believe that success is more about what we stand for than it is about our abilities. There are many educated derelicts. It is our ability to be accountable for our actions and to maintain integrity that passes the test of time. Study great leaders and I think you will find this to be true. There could be occasional exceptions to the rule, but for the most part, great leaders possess an ability to hold themselves and others accountable and they most often posses a high degree of integrity. Good stuff. I will continue to follow along. Thanks.

[Rosa Say]

That is a good quote Rocky. There was a trigger for me in that word combo of “self correction and discipline” for the self correction we do is self coaching with our own accountability – both what we have the authority for now, and in understanding for ourselves the authority (and hence greater accountability) we are becoming ready for.

And I love your man‘o, i.e. the belief you claim Rocky, “that success is more about what we stand for than it is about our abilities.” I think that it is so much easier to groom our abilities the way we want to once we are willing to stand up for what we believe. It’s that integrity of telling the truth – to ourselves (which is Pono).

[John Keoni Monte]

Aloha to All!

Growing up Hawaiian...has been a true and genuine blessing. I believe all people need to 'validate their existence' an internal process of information gathering, education, self evaluation, decision followed by action. As the saying goes: "Knowledge is Power'...but I would add: "only if the knowledge gained is put to use thru taking action, only then can it be considered power!"

Kuleana - sense of responsibility...again, I would add: sense of self, for all things emit from this center - our center of self out to the world. Not the other way around. Too often today, the perennial finger pointing goes on...only we forget, when you point a finger, you have 3 fingers pointing back at yourself!

And, I have learned, that 'any/all' answers are not 'outside' of ourselves...out there somewhere wandering aimlessly around. Everything we need - we were born with - and it is 'inside' where we can find most of what we need and seek.

Growing up in Southern California, this 'look inside' concept was attempted - but, along with 'peace, love, dope'...so, most of what could have been, was missed among the mist that fogged up most brains back then. Some are still there.

What slapped me out of it? Things like: Kuleana, along with 'truth' instead of myth & legend. Please, I believe myth and legend serve peoplekind tremendously...if...we take time, to look inside, and get it.

What do I mean? For example: Ancient Hawaiian Legends speak of the clouds parting - the gods coming down - and with their own hands they formed the land, the aina. Nice, romantic view, yeah? But...truth is...it is a fairly simple process to examine the soil and rock of Hawaii and determine the matrix of each is pure volcanic in origin. And so, along the ocean floor, rifts opened up, lava emitted, and once cooled = land began to form and rise, until it built up above sea level and beyond. I'll admit, the first version, feels more exciting. But through Kuleana - you'll find it's ok...ok to understand truth and move forth, without prejudice of previous story, myth and legend. It's ok.

This is the message I get from Rosa this month regarding Kuleana. She comes right at us...and, it's ok. Because we get to go 'inside' and discover truth and perhaps what things really mean to us.

Get Personal??? That's ok, too. Here's another example that kicks you right in the...oh sorry, I mean, strikes home: Myth/Legend: In ancient times, there were the gods and the Hawaiian people feared them and trembled at their sight. All Hawaiian peoples come from two of these gods: Papa and Wakea; it was they who gave us the kapus regarding men and women, husband and wife, should never eat together - seperate houses should be built for this. And, when woman is having her cycle - she must not sleep with her husband, but have a seperate house until she clears. In 1819, Kamehameha II (Liholiho), his mother Ka'ahumanu, and Keopuolani conspired to abolish this kapu forever and they did so by eating together. The Hawaiian people were shocked and heavily criticized the above for daring to destroy all that was sacred to the Hawaiian people! Again, nice, romantic, view, yeah?

Ok...now, here is the truth: Papa and Wakea were not gods...they were actual human beings in Hawaiian genealogy. They had a beautiful daughter named: Ho'ohokukalani. Her father, Wakea, decided that he wanted to sleep with his daughter - but he could not think how to do so without his wife, Papa, knowing. So, Wakea consulted and confided in his Kahuna, who came up with the idea of declaring some kapu,such as: There would be four sacred nights a month. During that time, Wakea and Papa would be separated as husband and wife, and certain foods would be prohibited for women to eat. The idea being that this separation would give Wakea the opportunity to go off and sleep with his daughter. I'm sure you follow me here! Papa, the wife, agreed because it was the Holy Priest, the Kahuna declaring the edict to all people, as if it came directly from the gods themselves. Papa, and the people, obeyed without question.

As time went by, there came a moment whereby Wakea, in his comfort - let his guard down and overslept without returning home before daylight. Papa returning home, first stopped by her daughters to give Aloha - and became aware of the deceipt and lies.

To save embarassment of Wakea, a leader of his time, the deceipt was never revealed to the people, as they would have killed both Wakea and the Kahuna for their evil deed. So...the lie continued...and to this day, is still taught in it's original creative myth/legend style. That is what I was taught, and believed for some 45 years!

Kuleana - self responsibility. The truth, the knowledge has been there all along. It was not until I took an oath of 'kuleana' - put it into action - and along the way, discovered a secret kept for centuries. And, no blame to Kamehameha II, Ka'ahumanu and Keopuolani - they too, adopted 'kuleana' and put it into action. Good for them! It's ok...

Rosa today...presents us with Kuleana; in a most personal way. What better method exists? None. The true way to the self is through all of the chapters in Rosa's book and in everything you read here. Period. Simple. Less is more...unless, you let me write about things! Ha, ha!

My commitment for February, for myself, is to absorb Kuleana even more...re-evaluate my every day actions, moment to moment - validate my existence, and move from that center.

Mahalo Rosa, for guiding us, gently or giving us one big kine slap, fo wake us up and get us to pay attention to what is important for our lives, our roles, our jobs, our beings...and all through the Aloha you share each month!

Aloha Pumehana, John Keoni Monte